Pain No.3

TV Meview 18.1.2009

Wow!

This is actually my first review post since the turn of the year. TV must be baaad!

Actually that's not far off true, but as new series come back in the next few weeks then I should have more reaction to post.

Christmas telly was awful though and I got used to playing on the PS3 to pass the time, unfortunately that meant neglecting my writing, but there's no way I could focus on that with all the kids around. I hoping to schedule in a few more posts in the coming week though.

So, where are we?

Saturday?

Must be X-Factor!

It's gone?

What's there instead?

Demons!

oh.

I have to say that Primeval seems to have set the bar for ITV genre efforts. Alas that means its only slightly better than BBC's Bonekickers.

There just doesn't seem to be any love in my heart for these shows, maybe I'm just jaded by by the Hollywood production levels of US network shows, but it's not just that. There's some kind of atmosphere or spark missing.

Maybe there just isn't the depth that some US shows have. I'm used to these kinds of shows being about more than just running around fighting monsters. In that sense it's just a glorified kids show. The episodes need to be about something. Look at the comparison with Life on Mars.

Each episode of Life on Mars took an issue and showed the different approaches to policing and life in general between now and then, allowing us to see how things have changed. In the middle of that they had an ongoing mystery about the main character and also had great supporting characters such as Gene Hunt. That was good writing. They put effort into getting a format that allowed them to squeeze the most out of the players they had on the table and the budget available to them.

With Demons however they seem to think that its enough to just have a couple of young, trendy looking characters and a mentor figure with an American accent chasing monsters and being put in peril each week. There are some heavy-handed attempts at characterisation, but nothing showing a deft touch or an understanding of people. I mean even Doctor Who, which is actually aimed at kids, had Rose's Mum get in on the secret because she wasn't stupid and noticed her kid was involved in some wierd stuff. Keeping a 'secret identity' is old hat. It's done to death.

Shows looking for an edge need to be brave enough for main characters to have their immediate family drawn in. Especially this story. I can imagine the emotion the Mum would go through when her little boy tells her he and his father's secret history. Yes, it may make it harder to write, but if I'm expected to give a hour of my life to some TV programme it at least needs to have the integrity of telling a story worth paying attention to.

A classic example of the difference between British and US shows is Eli Stone.

We ended up watching this last night as we missed the first showing on Tuesday. The second season started with a possible new direction for the characters as they moved on from the initial season's reactions of disbelief to Eli's visions. The good feelings still abounded though as people began to believe that they could make a difference.

It's well acted with top people in each role and great guest stars (my wife tells me that this was apparently Sigourney Weaver's only ever appearance on a TV show). I think there's an element of the show being a bit too luvvie, maybe, with the opportunity for big stars to do things they wouldn't normally get a chance to do. It takes its potshots at easy targets in order to create clear moral dilemmas, but occasionally they do throw in those storylines where the line is a bit greyer (it is a law show after all).

The actual storylines that stood out for me in the first season were the family trying to get their Mum to leave the army and the baseball player accused of murder. They were interesting plots in their own right, but also served to move on one or two of the main characters.

Now comparing this with Demons, the story itself was kind of secondary to the development of the characters. None of the people in this episode of Eli Stone were in the same place as they were at the beginning of the first series and yet they still felt like they were true to those people you were introduced to. Each episode or story pulls in the casual viewer whilst developing the main cast to reward longtime viewers.

Maybe its a handicap that UK shows suffer from. They tend to only have 6-8 episodes for budget heavy shows like these. Our TV economy doesn't really support productions like the US can where shows commonly get 22-24 episodes. That said Eli Stone, as good as I think it is, didn't do well in the US and only got 13 episodes per season as it never got picked up for the second half of its run. So an unsuccesful show in America is still better produced and better written than a UK counterpart? Sad, but true?

There's a temptation to say 'Well, let's lower the standards a bit and just enjoy what we can get.' I'm sorry though, but shows like Survivors and Life on Mars show that you can squeeze a lot more out of the short format series, unfortunately they seem to reserve the best efforts for mature audiences rather than giving us a well-written family show.

X-Factor? No, that's finished now remember?

Oh, you mean that!

Of course there is one other 'X-factor' in the equation. It does actually entertain the kids and introduces them to classic horror themes in a not-so-scary way (intentionally?). Does that justify its existence?

Well, I guess things can only get better for them.


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Now playing: Moby - Drug Fits the Face
via FoxyTunes

Desperado - A Random Story

Okay so Mum and Dad were out and I figured that this would be the night!

I knew it was here somewhere as Dad had left in the loo one night.

Honey Magazine.

And here I was buzzing like a whole hive of bees wanting to get my hands on it.

The guys in school always go on about who they've kissed and who they've slept with. Some of them have even dated the girls.

Not me.

The girls just tease me. They ask me out but they just giggle at me with their friends. If I manage to say anything at all its 'No'. Just out of total embarrassment.

But I'm a guy. I really like girls. REALLY like them.

They just don't like me.

Take today for instance. There's usually a day doesn't go by when I'm not pestered by one girl or another.

Today was no different, except that it was her.

The one girl I actually liked.

Jennifer Stoneham.

Man, if there was one girl I didn't want to make a fool of myself in front of, it was her!

It was lunch time and most things happen at lunch time. I reckon its partly the excitement at having no work for an hour combined with the frustration that a lot of that time is eaten away waiting in line for a school dinner.

So here I am minding my own business standing in line for lunch. Suddenly there's a crash up ahead. I look up the queue to see Jennifer, hands in the air, shock on her face (I love the way her nose wrinkles!) staring down at the floor. There was a big mess from where her tray had obviously fallen.

Everyone just stood and stared until one of the dinner ladies said, 'Well? Are you just going to stand there appreciating the abstract representation of the destruction of the agricultural industry in the UK or are you going to clean it up?'

She's a funny one, that dinner lady. I think she goes to evening class or something.

Jennifer bent down and started gingerly stabbing at the kaleidoscope of vegetables on the floor. I know adults think its hard enough getting teenagers to tidy up after themselves at the best of times. I think the stereotype was being proved right here.

The guys she usually hung around with were just smirking. I don't get why she's with them. Her girlfriends had a look of disdain and made no move to help.

I couldn't bear her being humiliated like this so I stepped forward.

'Here let me help' I heard myself say.

She looked up at me.

She looked up.

At Me!

She pushed some of her long black hair back behind her ear and her eyes darted around to gauge everyone's reaction.

'Thanks.' She said and looked back down to the food.

Thinking about it now. We probably had the whole canteen looking at us. All I could see was her.

I knelt down and flipped the tray back over. I kept glancing across to her as I placed the plate back on the tray and used the flat side of her knife to start scraping food back on to it.

My parents worked long hours so I usually had to fend for myself. Hence the lack of a packed lunch. Even I'm not good enough to make a sandwich first thing in the morning!

Jennifer had stopped her attempts and was just watching me.

Our eyes met.

'ooo-ooh! Johnny's in luuuurve!'

That was Mark.

I hate him.

Mark Bridges, the bane of my life. He's not the meanest guy in the school and he's not the most popular either. He's into drama and stuff. Everyone thinks he's gonna be an actor. His friends are a mix of goths, swots and the athletics team. Worst of all he lives next door so I can never escape him.

The moment was gone and I finished up. Jennifer stood and turned to walk away. My eyes followed as she took my heart with her.

'Watch out Jenny! He's looking up your skirt!'

There are times when I wished I was the kind who responded to things with my fists. I wasn't going to.

People were watching. I wanted the show to be over. Unfortunately, Mark lived for the limelight.

The laughter that rocked the room gave him his approval.

Even though I wanted to disappear down a dark hole I clung onto the look in Jennifer's eyes. Had she actually seen me. ME?

'He's on his knees. He's going to propose marriage!'

The laughter rolled around the canteen again. I was thankful for small mercies. I was in a safe space. If I'd been outside I'm sure his words would have been chosen to humiliate me further.

I got up and meekly and returned to my place in the queue. I felt like Moses as the line parted for me. There was no danger of me being jostled at the counter.

The dinner lady dishing out the slops gave me a look I didn't really understand. I made my way over to an empty table. My friends were probably well into their game of soccer at the moment. I was going to wolf this food down and join them as soon as I could.

Instead all I could do was push my food around as I was lost in the memory of that olive skin, the black hair and those green eyes.

Before I had a chance to feel too morose I heard the chair next to me scrape.

'Can I sit down?'

I knew who it was before I turned around. My heart had already lept into my mouth.

A strangled word came out. I think it was 'yes' but she was already in the chair.

'Hi' she said.

'...hi' I said in a slightly more human voice.

'I wanted to say thank you for what you did.'

'sure'

There was a pause. I guess she was used to guys being a bit more mouthy.

'Well, I know we're in a few classes together so if you want to say hi again, or any other word you choose to mangle, then feel free.'

If I could have been anymore dumbfounded then I would have been. Instead I entered the negative zone and my nerves took over.

'I..I..definitely. I mean thank you. umm...no...uhh...yes.' I saw her try to stifle a smile.

'When I can stop shaking inside I'd love to be able to have a normal conversation with you.'

'That's great.' said Jennifer as she stood up again. 'It's Friday tomorrow. Maybe I'll see you in town at Georgie's'.

'You will.' I replied, forgetting that I had never been 'in town' on Friday before and I've never managed to get away with looking older than my sixteen years either!

As she walked back to her friends. I caught Mark scowling at me. He obviously wasn't happy that something had gone my way.

I flipped him.

'Stick that!' my eyes said. He turned back to his friends.

Since then the excitement has been building inside me and combined with my imagination's efforts to determine exactly how far I'd get with Jennifer tomorrow it has grown exponentially.

I really needed that magazine.

It had been a little while since Mum and Dad had left and they hadn't nipped back for anything so I figured they were gone for the night now.

Woo hoo! I had all evening with me and my honey!

My limited sexual imagination only went so far and my desires wanted to go further. I needed inspiration to think about Jennifer so I could find release.

The first place I looked was the loo. I don't know why. Maybe it was because it was the only place I'd seen it before.

No luck.

In my fervent state though I noticed an nearly empty loo roll on the wall.

I wonder... My mind started getting creative!

It was rough but a bit loose. I had to grip it to get any sensation. It wasn't very sexy. I wanted more!!

I threw it in the bin, a bit crumpled but otherwise as I'd found it.

I moved onto the landing. There was an airing cupboard. I was sure there were towels in there that hadn't been taken out for years. Maybe it was in there somewhere?

Climbing up on the shelves to reach the very top I felt around. My hand came across a box. I brought it down to check inside.

The box said it contained a neck massager. Opening it I was disappointed to find out that's exactly what it contained. I guess it had been put up there because it never got used. I'd certainly never seen my parents using it.

Cursing my luck I put it back. I should've known I wouldn't find it in there. Dad never went near that cupboard as mum did all the washing.

I glanced across the hall. The most obvious place was their room.

Where was Danny Ocean when I needed him?

I cautiously stepped into my parent's bedroom. I expected alarm bells to go off as I moved further in. The laser beams must be invisible.

Ransacking is probably an overstatement, but I left no stone unturned as I went through the bedroom. I didn't want to leave any evidence of my intrusion.

My efforts were rewarded when I found it hidden amongst some knitting magazines. I have no idea who those belonged to. I think I would have felt more shame at being found with those!

My elation was mixed with a kind of desperation.

What now?!!

I decided to go downstairs and stretch on the sofa. I could sit up and be comfortable like that.

Making my way downstairs I looked around. My paranoia about what I was about to do got the better of me and I locked the front door, which led straight into the living room, so that my parents couldn't burst in at the wrong moment!

Treating the magazine like a holy object, not wanting to damage it so that Dad would notice, I laid down on the sofa. I wriggled my trousers and pants down a bit and then paid the magazine some attention.

Honey Magazine - Girlz for Guyz Like U.

It was full of hot babes who looked only a bit older than me. I tried not to think this was what my Dad liked. I also did my best not to think of my Mum either.

I turned the pages carefully, taking in each picture, each pose, each detail. Both hidden and on show.

This was like a sex overload!

I found it difficult to leave each page, but the next page always seemed more exciting than the last.

All the girls were blond so far but the next one...Wow!

She wasn't quite like Jennifer as her hair was longer and even blacker than hers. My body reacted immediately.

I slipped myself into my hand enjoying the hardness.

I'd done this before but it never felt quite the way it did tonight. I felt like there was a fire inside me and there was only one way to quench it!

I started slowly as I took in the pictures on the page and married them to my memory of Jennifer.

Soon I'd lost the need for the magazine as I was lost in mix of fantasy and pleasure I had never known.

'Rat-at-at-tat!'

'FUCK ME!!!' I shouted as I was torn with great force back into reality.

I launched myself off the sofa in fright, forgetting where I was and tripping up as my trousers tangled around my legs.

'If you really want me to!'

I looked at the front door where the voice had come from. The letter box was open and there was a pair of eyes sparkling with amusement.

MARK!!!!

'What the hell do you want!' I shouted furiously whilst trying to pull myself up and save what little dignity I had left.

The letterbox snapped shut and I could hear howls of laughter.

'Fuck off back home!' I was still hyped and embarrasment, fear, anger and frustration created a heady mix of emotion.

'My Dad wants his golf clubs back.'

I looked near the door and there they were. So thats what Dad had said as he left. I hadn't really been listening, my mind was elsewhere.

Our Dads got on quite well. Well enough to split the cost of a full golf caddy.

How was I going to explain why I hadn't handed them over without turning beetroot red as I lied through my teeth?

I got myself sorted, but my underwear was very uncomfortable as I dealt with a wierd feeling of arousal at having been caught. I just wish it hadn't been him.

Why him?!!

'Okay you can come in, get the clubs and go okay?' I demanded.

'I don't want to be here any longer than I have to be either.' He replied.

'As long as we understand each other.'

I opened the door and let him in.

'So what were you looking at?' Mark said as he dashed inside, picking the magazine up off the floor and dumping himself on the sofa. He ran his hand over where I'd been sitting on the sofa.

'Get out!'

'I'll get it out if you want me too?' and he undid his zip.

'Put that away!' I inistinctively shut the door in case anyone saw.

'Make me!'

I was at a loss for words. I was still horny as hell and now one of the greatest frustrations of my life was preventing me from finding relief!

'Please just take the clubs and go.' I pleaded.

He was just sat there magazine in one hand, stroking with the other. I'd never seen another hard-on before. Then I noticed that Mark wasn't actually looking at the magazine.

'We used to be friends didn't we?' he said.

'That was until you started being nasty to me.'

He looked me in the eyes. There was something behind them. I didn't have to wait to long to find out what it was.

'I really fancy you Johnny. I always have. I'm gay.'

My heart dropped like a stone. The past few years suddenly took on a new meaning.

He leant forward and confidently put his hand inside my trousers. In my rush I hadn't done up the zipper.

Feeling someone's touch on my dick was amazing. That it was someone who had become my mortal enemy was confusing. I was too numb to even bother with the fact that it was a guy.

I was now on another level of hardness. I had to put my hand on his shoulder to steady myself as I went weak at the knees.

He pulled it out.

'Johnny.'

'..hunh?'

'I have to say that is the biggest dick I've ever seen.'

'whhu?'

I could hardly breath. The tension in me was enormous. My chest was tight and my breathing shallow. I could feel myself going lightheaded.

What was I doing?

'I was so jealous that you got on with Jennifer today.' Mark said as he pulled the skin right down causing a wave of pleasure that went right through me.

'You've always liked her. But I wanted you.' He started slowly moving his hand up and down my dick, twisting a little everytime he reached the top.

'Do you know how that feels. To see the guy you have feelings for lusting after someone else?' He moved his head close and gently blew across the tip.

'I had no intention of doing this, but seeing you on the sofa. I just can't stop myself.' I put my other hand on his head as he placed his lips on me. My breath getting shakier still as I held back on my nerves. I still wasn't sure I wanted to be doing this.

'mmmm. Johnny.'

I brought myself up on tip toes as he placed his mouth around my dick and brought it in. How was this happening? I was too horny to really care!

He did things to me I didn't even know you could do.

I couldn't believe I was about to find relief in this way!

'uh...uh...uh...'

'Johnny?'

'yeh.'

Mark pulled away and licked his lips 'I need to go now'

'no.'

'I'm sorry I need to.' He stood up. 'I'm enjoying this but I know I'm just here at the right time and right place.'

He wiped the back of his hand across his mouth, mopping up his saliva.

'You need to choose Johnny. She's never really noticed you. She may be paying you some attention at the moment but her mind, and everything else, is on other guys'

Suck my dick. That's all I wanted to say, but I could see that would be just using him. I could live with that though. He hurt me a lot over the last few years. Why can't I just get some payback?

'Good night Johnny' and he was gone.

I was totally deflated. In mind as well as body.

Was there really a choice? There was what I wanted and what was on offer.

I tidied myself up and put the magazine away and plonked on the sofa.

A big sigh escaped me, as did time, my mind rushing with thoughts and possibilities.

When my parents came home I was relieved.

I gave my Mum a big hug and went to bed saying nothing.

Tomorrow was another day.

But I would be more than just a day older.









Character: Insert Plot: Honey Resolution: Relieve

Regrets No.1

Iruwiri and the Baby - A Random Story

The noise woke Iruwiri from his slumber.

Iruwiri rose slightly, his snout pointing down the burrow trying to locate the direction it had come from.

There seemed to be a constant rumble, but no further noise was heard. Instead it was the smell that started to worry him. It carried hints of bushfire but it was more...vulgar...than that. It had the smell of Man about it.

Not Man itself, but those strange creatures they inhabited that did their walking for them.

They cared nothing for bushlife, especially his own kind who he often came across lying mutilated on the Man-trails. The creatures, known as the Reeawwrrr due to the cry they make as they pass you by, they were indestructible. Nothing could stand against them.

Not even the Kangaroos.

Iruwiri, like most of Wombat-kind, kept himself to himself. Night had not yet fallen but the smell was getting stronger and was making him feel queasy. As he moved toward the entrance he saw that smoke was filling the burrow. He was sure though that this was no bushfire.

He scooted out before the smoke overcame him only to discover the most terrifying sight. It should have been daylight but the smoke was so thick and black that he could not see the awful blue sky and its relentless yellow sun. He had no love for the daytime heat and yet there was a different source that was not bearing down on him from above.

He knew that where the smoke was thickest up ahead there would be fire.

And yet his curiosity got the better of him.

Cautiously he made his way closer to the smoke plume. He skirted around where it was thickest and then he saw it.

It was one of the creatures, mortally wounded and lying on it's side. It's mouth gaped open with fire and smoke pouring out of it. A spiders web had appeared over the transparent pouch through which the humans it transported could view their destination. Iruwiri often wondered what it was that made these humans travel so much inside these creatures. Were they its master after all or were they a parasite of some kind. He had occasionally seen a human feed it and wash it. He had seen many creatures refuse to transport them any further despite the animated protests of the men. It had just sat there ignoring them.

This creature would travel no more. Iruwiri ventured closer. He could see that a limb of a man, possibly the female of its kind, rested lifelessly on the ground through another opening within the pouch's transparent skin.

Iruwiri had never been this close to a man before, not even a dead one. He wondered if they smelt the same as his own kin who had suffered similar fates beneath the crushing power of these forever-moving beasts.

As he approached he saw that there was something else in the back of the Reeawwrrr's pouch. It was an infant-man. A baby.

A sudden pop and crackle of flame from the creature's mouth caused the webbed skin at the front of the pouch to shatter and fall all around him. This made him leap backwards away from the Reeawwrrr.

He was about to run away when the beast started to make another sound. Except he knew it couldn't be the beast. Despite the differences between them, Iruwiri knew the cry of a young one in distress.

There was nothing he could do. He knew that man would never help him if the situation were reversed and so he backed away carefully. It was then he became aware of the reaction of other denizens in the bush. Notably the dingos. Their howls carried over distance. The smoke from the Reeawwrrr was like a beacon to them.

Despite himself Iruwiri could not leave the baby man alone to this fate. He would not wish it on any living creature.

He went back to the Reeawwrrr to see if there was anything he could do to help. He disliked the heat and the smoke was getting more intense but he managed to get inside the pouch by squeezing past the dead female. He saw that there was something like a vine keeping hold of the baby. Maybe these humans were actually food for a Reeawwrrr hive and this was a drone taking back food for the rest of his kind. It started to make sense now.

The vine tasted disgusting as he gnawed at it. It was like nothing else he had ever tasted. There was no life in it. The baby had stopped crying and was looking at him. He took that as a good sign looking up to see if it was happy now, but the stunted nose, the furless skin and wide mouth were too strange for him. He couldn't tell. Then he caught the eyes. There was something about them.

Iruwiri realised he had stopped chewing and quickly resumed. The dingos would have plenty to feast on here but he had no intention of himself and the baby being included.

Finally he managed to snap the vine he had been nibbling away at. The baby slid down and hit the inside of the Reeawwrrr with a bump. Its face changed and the wailing started again. Iruwiri took it that the baby was hurt but he knew worse would happen if they stayed any longer.

He moved behind the baby and nudged it gently in the direction he had entered. The wailing continued. He tried again, but nothing. This baby seemed incapable of even the simplest instruction. He could barely see out through the pouch but thankfully what wind there was steered the poisonous cloud away from the car so it was still relatively smoke free inside.

Being a cautious wombat by nature Iruwiri felt a frustration that he could not get this infant-man to recognise the danger and leave. Instead he channeled that nervous tension and snapped hold of the childs outer skin which hung loosely from his body and started to drag the baby out.

The baby protested but all it did was cry louder. Iruwiri knew this meant the scavengers and predators would follow this sound before they investigated the source of smoke. He relied more on his memory to guide him out of the smoke than his poor eyesight or overwhelmed sense of smell.

He knew that the baby was getting more distressed and no-doubt was in pain too, but pain meant you were still alive so its nothing to complain about. As they were leaving the smoke he tried to clear his nose to get a sense of his environment.

He didn't need to. The howls of the dingos were nearly upon them. There was only one place to go.

As he continued to scuttle backwards pulling the baby with him he noticed that in the dusty trail they were leaving there was a stain. The baby was bleeding somehow. The scavengers would pick up that scent in no time.

Iruwiri knew he wasn't far now but time was running out.

He reached the entrance to his burrow and let go of the infant-man. he sized up the entrance and figured that it would fit through. Once they were in they'd be safe.

The only problem now would be how to get the baby in. He wasn't hopeful. It showed no real sign of intelligence. He started to feel regret at what he had gotten himself into. He was interfering with nature. The weak only survived if they were clever enough and this thing seemed to have neither strength nor quickness of thought.

If he hadn't come along then events would have taken their natural path.

He decided he had done all he could. He was now putting himself in danger of the advancing Dingoes.

Iruwiri took one look at the baby and dived into his burrow.

The outside world was no longer his concern down here where it was safe. The wind had changed taking the smoke away from his burrow. THe stench would cling and overpower everything for a while but then it would be gone.

He realised he had half-been listening to the sound of the baby crying. It had stopped now.

There was nothing he could do. He had done enough. Life goes on.

A new sound got his attention. It was a scrabbling noise. At the mouth of his burrow.

He stiffened ready for defence. He was on his territory now and no Dingo would get him down here. He backed gingerly down the tunnel entrance. A sound echoed through the burrow.

The sound of the baby!

The Infant-man was trying to follow Iruwiri into the burrow!

Iruwiri made his way back up to entrance the babywas nearly through the narrow neck. Hetried to help by scrabbling some dirt away around the baby. It made noises as it noticed him inthe near dark. He didn't know these humans could see in the dark without their sun-twigs or the fierce eyes of the Reeawwrrrs.

The baby moved down into the extra space as the wombat cleared a way. Soon the baby was curled up in one of the chambers. Iruwiri went back to the entrance to repair some of the tunnel.

He was caught off-guard as the muzzle of a dingo plunged into the widened entrance and snapped just short of his fur.

Iruwiri acted on instinct. He turned his sharp digging claws onto the Dingo and thrust upward into the roof of the tunnel causing the scavenger to squeal in pain and jump back, away from the burrow.

There was no rest for the brave marsupial though as another Dingo took his place almost immediately desperately following the scent of blood.

A second attempt at lashing out missed. Iruwiri may be brave but he wasn't stupid. He'd moved back just beyond reach of the snapping jaws.

The dingo pulled back and started scrabbling at the entrance trying to make it bigger.

A thundercrack froze the dingo instantly. Iruwiri saw it pull out of the burrow then run away with a whimper.

Before he could question why it had given up the answer came sharply through the breeze.

Man had arrived.

He poked his nose out of the burrow to take a glance at what was happening. Before he could take everything in he was grabbed and pulled out by the throat. He found himself face to face with a full-grown man. This one even had fur instead of the normal smooth skin.

The man was barking very loud at Iruwiri and the tone struck fear into him. He had survived the Dingo's only to be faced with death at the hands of a human.

He was held there for what seemed like forever as he anticipated the man's next move. Suddenly he found himself flying through the air and landing in the bush. The Man had given up on him and was now turned to the burrow.

From the bush Iruwiri could just see his burrow. At the entrance another Man was knelt down by the hole he seemed to be reaching out.

As he adjusted himself slightly, ignoring the pain in his left paw, he could see the baby emerging. It was safe now.

Iruwiri turned his back on the humans and hobbled off to find a new place to burrow. As he left he wondered if the legends he had been told when he suckled were true. Had there been a time when humans and animals lived and worked together in the bush? Were there really still a few of them around? He decided that no matter the past it was always the human that wins in the end.

If the sturdy wombat had turned around just then he would have seen the furry human turn in his direction and growl. Had he been able to understand their language he would have had hope.

'Thanks friend.'











Character: Baby Plot: Wombat Resolution: Wins

Truths No.2

Goodbye to 2008

It feels like the right time to take a break from the holiday fun (such as it is, with both Karen and myself both full up with a cold) and take a look back at what's gone down with this year.
Musical Highlight of 2008
As ever, tying me down to one standout musical moment of any time period (unless it's the last five minutes) is impossible. I have a favourite song for every mood and occasion and I love them all equally on an emotional level. However, as the point of this blog is about writing I'll try and be more critical.

Usually a decade has a musical trend that defines it usually in the main pop scene but also on the underground levels. This year, I think the dominant trend is for pop to have drawn heavily on underground 80's indie sounds. The Wombats, Foals, Black Kids, Ladyhawke, Late of the Pier and Friendly Fires have all come to the fore sounding like a progression of the bands that I thought were cool and rebellious when I was in high school (which is now longer ago than I like to admit).

Its been a good year in other areas too though with bands like Hot Chip, TV on the Radio and Kings of Leon as top contenders.

Ultimately though I'm torn between two bands from the US who don't actually sound like they're from the US.

MGMT and Vampire Weekend.

I like both for different reasons. Vampire Weekend are VERY pop, but not cringily so. There's nothing wrong with catchy songs so long as they are sincere attempts at expression and not cynical productions following a formula where the artist doesn't matter. I can enjoy that kind of pop.

MGMT on the other hand represent that other side of me that just wants to rebel against the norms. They aren't rebellious in the seventies punk style, I guess its more akin to the hippie kind of anarchy that their dress style seems to represent.

If I had to choose one then it would probably be Vampire Weekend, if only because they seem to have more places to go whereas I'm not sure how MGMT can sustain their invention over more than one album. Instead I'm going to give it to MGMT for one reason only. I can't play the VW album to my kids because of the swearing, which is a shame because they love the edited versions they see on the TV.

TV Highlight of 2008
I'd like to throw up a surprise or two here but at the moment there's nothing that really touches my pick for the year. Before I reveal it though I'll give a few honourable mentions for programs that I've enjoyed even if they haven't set my TV world on fire.

Harry Hill has been consistently funny thoughout the year. His TV Burp program shows the absurdity of taking TV programs too seriously and his trick of inserting himself into the programs through clever editing tickles my funnybones in particular.

Battlestar Galactica was also an intermittent pleasure but it can be heavy going as it is quite plot driven. Knowing it was coming to an end seemed to lift this seasons episodes and I'm looking forward to the return of the final episodes in the new year.

Chuck was another show that had potential this year. It was consistently enjoyable, but not dazzlingly so. With a second series coming in 2009 aybe it can shine a bit brighter.

A late contender was Survivors but the BBC's habit of only producing a handful of episodes per series means that it was over before it began. With a second set of episodes scheduled for next year then at least we know there's more to come but it's not enough to give it top spot.

Finally we come to my actual choice for the year. With an expectation bending season that looked like it might not even get off the ground, the 14 episodes of Lost that kicked off the year set the benchmark and was never beaten. With the developments coming thick and fast we finally saw some payoff to the first few seasons and whilst some questions about the plot have been answered we still have many more questions about the characters still to go. Do they have a larger purpose in the scheme of things. Does the Island have some larger purpose or will it all boil down to some small-time ambitions. At the moment I'm as hooked as I ever was and even though I'm probably setting myself up for a fall when the final season comes along, I'm still enjoying the ride. So Lost gets my TV pick for the year.

Movie of 2008
There's nothing I'd like better than to name some obscure, foreign-language film as my pick of 2008, but unfortunately I've been cured of my movie snobbery, so I guess I'll just have to go with the film I enjoyed the most.

The Dark Knight was the years most hyped film but for me it kind of disappeared up its own backside and failed to tell a compelling Batman story. I've always seen Bats as a detective so I actually like to see him using his brain once in a while. His fisticuffs should only be employed to get to where he knows he already wants to be, the fights and gadgets are secondary to the fact that essentially he is the greatest detective mind pitting his wits against other criminal masterminds. His greates enemies are usually insane because that makes them unpredictable. Those who follow a logical thought pattern are easy to catch. There should have been a better battle of wits between the two, although I have to admit the final showdown was classic. The switch was only predictable until just before it happened and it dawned what was going to happen. Ultimately disappointing for me.

Instead another film from the comic book genre came to my rescue. Iron Man showed lots of wit and character even though the film had even more of an excuse to show off gadgets than Batman did. It also showed the difference between Marvel and DC even more so than before. Marvel's ethos has always been about superheroes in the real world whereas DC invented cities to reflect the characters they created. Therefore DC created fantasy heroes who faced fantasy villains which you knew they would escape from. Marvel however put the hero in the real world, facing real threats and you were then able to suspend disbelief that the hero was in real danger.

So the charming Tony Stark (aka Robert Downey Jr) takes my pick as movie of the year.

There you go! The top awards go to MGMT, Lost and Iron Man.

I hope the next year has more in store than this past year.


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